Thursday, March 28, 2013

Top 5 Korean Values When Dating Korean Women

Top 5 Korean Values When
Dating Korean Women

Discover which Korean values your Korean woman has will help you understand her better.

You'll realize why she's acting the way she is. 
Does how she act puzzle you? 
Is she doing things that shock you?

When you start dating Korean women you're dealing with BOTH a different gender AND value system as well.

Your Korean woman values

 • family obligations over you

 • social harmony over you

 • social status over you

 • the greater good over you

 • practicality

We'll also uncover which values she DOESN'T have.  This will help you understand why you and her are at fundamental odds.  Or if you're going to date Korean women you'll be prepared to deal with the cultural clashes.

Korean Women Value Family Obligations

When your Korean woman is asking questions about your family - it's more than just because of curiosity.

Her Korean values dictate that she be responsible for helping your family (if it gets serious) and her own.  If you're the eldest in your family she might be concerned because she might feel responsible for them.

She also cares about your and her family's opinions of you dating.  If her parents tell her that it's okay to date you (a foreigner) then she'll feel comfortable being with you.

Otherwise chances are slim!

If her parents would oppose you dating then she might just not tell them about you.  If you ask to meet them she will say "maybe later" but has no intention of introducing you to them.

For Westerners in general we consider our parents' opinions too.  But we ultimately decide for ourselves.   Not so for the Korean woman you're dating.

Korean Women Value Social Harmony

Does she cringe every time you and your buddies argue passionately?  Sure for you it's all fun and games.  For her she's nervous because Korean values dictate that people maintain social harmony.

Is she being polite but you get a feeling that something's wrong?  Was she quiet about everything until she suddenly burst into anger and/or left you?

That's because Koreans aren't supposed to talk about their problems.  They're only supposed to bear with them.  What's more important is looking like everything is okay and if things aren't then just leave.

This is socially more acceptable than confronting (as Westerners would rather do) than facing the shame of the discord.

The same goes with her friends.  If dating you is causing discord among her friends she'll rethink dating you.  Or in any case it will affect your dating situation.

Koreans Value Your Social Status

When you first met her did she ask you what your job was?  How about your age?  Koreans ask each other how old they are and their title to slot each other on the social totem pole.

You can satisfy one of the most superficial of Korean values with

 • your clothing

 • your job

 • where you live and what you drive

If you want to make your Korean woman happy then I recommend

 • upgrading your wardrobe

 • giving yourself a better job title

 • moving on up

Sure in the West we value results and believe that your position in life is based on how hard you work.  For Koreans it's more than that - it also determines your value as a human being and the amount of respect you'll get.

The 'Greater' Good

Koreans are an interesting people.  They'll sacrifice themselves to make sure who they care about succeeds or even lives. 

This is what Korean dramas and movies portray so well.  Granted they tend to sacrifice more for the family's greater good than anyone else.

So what does that mean?  When you're dating a Korean woman she'll be willing to sacrifice her own happiness to make those around her happy.  She'll also do it without much complaining or fighting back.

This is too a much greeter extend than you would see for the West.

Korean Women Value Practicality

Most Korean values lead to one thing - practicality.

When a Korean woman is considering you for a relationship she's looking at how practical it is first.

She wants to know how much money you're making and how old you are.  She also wants to know who your friends and family are.  She finally checks with her friends and family and if it's okay to date you.

THEN she considers you with with respect to your personality and charisma.

Granted this 'mercenary' approach varies from girl to girl but her society will push her to be practical.  This is different than in the West. 

In the West there's more value to a woman being able to choose for herself and can do what she wants.

Not so for a Korean woman.

So if she's dating you your status and position in life plays a major part.

These Values Aren't
Necessarily Korean Values...

Independence -  Koreans are taught at an early age to be dependent on their society.  The Korean woman you're dating has never lived alone.  She also has only learned rote memorization at school.

In Korea there are very few entrepreneurs and people are discouraged to be so.

Rational thought - In the West we learn to grasp abstract thoughts.  We have philosophers that questioned everything.  Not so in Korea. In fact you can ask your Korean girl if she knows of any Korean poets or philosophers. 

Quality of life - Is your Korean woman always studying?  Or is she trying to improve her academic or work life?  That's because it's all she knows.  You try to take her on a spontaneous vacation and chances are she'll have to "study".

How Are Korean Values Changing?

korean values
Korea is rapidly changing as we speak.

What the older generations of Koreans valued will be forgotten.

The younger generations have more money and freedom to think for themselves.

So if they like you chances are you'll influence her decision.

This is good news for you because it means that your Korean woman is more likely with you because she dared to think for herself.

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